Either you're an a**hole or your dead!"

***disclaimer*** - this blog did happen and its quite interesting, but alas, i did not have one part in the creation of this post. you can probably guess who wrote this....

I've spent another awesome spring day cooped up inside my west villag eoffice. fortunately, to break up my otherwise mind-numbingly boring day, I was blessed with the wonderfully melodic sound of someone laying into their car horn. no, not the polite *beep beep* meaning,"please kindly notice that your vehicle may collide with mine should you continue on your current course." and no, not even the more urgent *beeeeep* of "sir, now that the light has changed from red to green,you are free to move your foot from the brake pedal to the gas pedal thus granting me enough room to move my car around your apparently slower moving car." this was more of a *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…………….* asin "hey you stupid mother !#@$&, move your mother #@*&!, piece of $%& hoopty before I………"

however, after about 5 minutes of this constant noise, my coworker decided that we'd misunderstood the *beep*. instead, we suspected that this was the *beep* of a man slumped over the steering wheel of his car as the firemen were engaging the jaws of life to pry his car open like a can of spam as paramedics stood ready to yank this man's near-lifeless body off the steering wheel and into the waiting ambulance. or at least, this is the explanation that our creative minds came up with.

so I was explaining this to my awesomely cool friend, Peter, who by the way is tall, dark, handsome, funny, charming, sincere, generous,kind, smart, talented…(this could go on forever but I think would be better suited for aseparate post)…when he commented on the morbidness of our conclusion. so I explained the circumstances and how we first thought that he was just an a**hole leaning on that horn a little longer than normal. but when it didn'tstop, we figured he was dead.

then I explained to Peter, "We're in NewYork. Either you're an a**hole or you're dead!"